Thursday, March 31, 2005
Just Don't Look! Just Don't Look!
U.S. has limited intellig...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Oil prices risin...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
World Bank President Paul Wolfo...MICHAEL JACKSON!!
Carbon Dioxide levels ris...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Social secu...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Get back in the kitchen, and make me some pie!
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U.S. has limited intellig...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Oil prices risin...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
World Bank President Paul Wolfo...MICHAEL JACKSON!!
Carbon Dioxide levels ris...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Social secu...TERRI SCHIAVO!!
Get back in the kitchen, and make me some pie!
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Where's Your God Now, "Reverend"?
Now, I never really ever MEAN it when I say "I wish ________ was dead." or "God, why won't ____________ just fuck off and die?" I would rarely ever wish that somebody get critically ill. And I would almost NEVER celebrate a person contracting a terminal disease or dying.
That being said, I can't tell you how fancifully I danced around my room when I read THIS. I looked like a crazy gay ice princess ballerina swan on a cocaine binge. Which, of course, God hates and will make me burn in hell for forever.
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Now, I never really ever MEAN it when I say "I wish ________ was dead." or "God, why won't ____________ just fuck off and die?" I would rarely ever wish that somebody get critically ill. And I would almost NEVER celebrate a person contracting a terminal disease or dying.
That being said, I can't tell you how fancifully I danced around my room when I read THIS. I looked like a crazy gay ice princess ballerina swan on a cocaine binge. Which, of course, God hates and will make me burn in hell for forever.
Saturday, March 26, 2005
Mesmerize
May 17, bitches.
MTV.com already has the first single, B.Y.O.B., streaming and free. Check it out.
Oh, and it's fucking GOOD.
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May 17, bitches.
MTV.com already has the first single, B.Y.O.B., streaming and free. Check it out.
Oh, and it's fucking GOOD.
Friday, March 25, 2005
A Friendly Reminder
Eat lots of raw, dripping, bloody flesh today. It's Good Friday!
(Crucified, raw, dripping, bloody flesh is the best.)
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Eat lots of raw, dripping, bloody flesh today. It's Good Friday!
(Crucified, raw, dripping, bloody flesh is the best.)
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Panic Grips Connecticut. Again.
I live in the Northeast. Specifically New England; more specifically, Connecticut; and even MORE specifically Meriden, CT. Being that we are in the Northeast quadrant of the United States, we tend to get snow every year, usually in the winter months. This is not some spectacular phenomenon, it doesn't catch us by surprise and, in fact, it is EXPECTED annually. We dont get a Buffalo, NY level of snow, where they stop measuring in inches and just use feet. We don't even get a Utica, NY level of snow, which can usually end up being knee-to-waist deep. We get about the same amount of snow as most of Massachussetts, New York City and, to a lesser extent, Pennsylvania. Now, the weathermen up around here usually can forecast snow 3 to 4 days in advance, and are usually fairly accurate as to how much snow we get at any given time. This is all necessary information for the rest of this post.
A couple days ago, it was announced that Connecticut, once again, was going to get blasted by snow on Wednesday afternoon through the evening. Just this morning, everyone said we should get between 5 and 8 inches of snow; certainly not a devastating or crippling amount of snow by any stretch of the imagination, though it is more than we usually get in a single snowfall. I had to drop off my brother at work at Wal-Mart today at 6:00 PM. As I was exiting the consumerist superpower, I noticed a man in his early 40's. He seemed to be struggling with his carriage, so I decided to look at what he was purchasing:
Twenty-Four 1-gallon jugs of drinking water.
That's 24 GALLONS of water. So, I looked in his carriage, then back at him, then back at the carriage again. And, while I was standing there, contemplating the fact that people by gallons of water by the dozen, I felt a small portion of my evil brain spontaneously combust. In what world, in what plane of existence, would a 5 INCH SNOWFALL constitute the necessity of 24 gallons of water? Why, in the name of all that is sweet and good in Odin's Beard, would you feel the need to stock up on water during a snowfall that wouldn't even cover my cock? How do you drive to Wal-Mart during the beginning of a snowstorm, pass by the beverage aisle, glance over at the Wal-Mart-brand gallon jugs of water and think "Fuck! There's snow everywhere and it might last until...well..until later tomorrow! I don't know if I can survive until then, I'd better stock up on WATER!!"
It boggles the mind how people who live in Connecticut, who have lived in Connecticut for most of thier lives, can consistently freak the fuck out over a little fucking SNOW every fucking year.
Oh, and learn how to drive, fuckwads. Don't blast down a residential road at 40 mph and be surprised when you spin out into someone's mailbox. And the parking lights are for PARKING, headlights are for DRIVING.
God, I hate people.
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I live in the Northeast. Specifically New England; more specifically, Connecticut; and even MORE specifically Meriden, CT. Being that we are in the Northeast quadrant of the United States, we tend to get snow every year, usually in the winter months. This is not some spectacular phenomenon, it doesn't catch us by surprise and, in fact, it is EXPECTED annually. We dont get a Buffalo, NY level of snow, where they stop measuring in inches and just use feet. We don't even get a Utica, NY level of snow, which can usually end up being knee-to-waist deep. We get about the same amount of snow as most of Massachussetts, New York City and, to a lesser extent, Pennsylvania. Now, the weathermen up around here usually can forecast snow 3 to 4 days in advance, and are usually fairly accurate as to how much snow we get at any given time. This is all necessary information for the rest of this post.
A couple days ago, it was announced that Connecticut, once again, was going to get blasted by snow on Wednesday afternoon through the evening. Just this morning, everyone said we should get between 5 and 8 inches of snow; certainly not a devastating or crippling amount of snow by any stretch of the imagination, though it is more than we usually get in a single snowfall. I had to drop off my brother at work at Wal-Mart today at 6:00 PM. As I was exiting the consumerist superpower, I noticed a man in his early 40's. He seemed to be struggling with his carriage, so I decided to look at what he was purchasing:
Twenty-Four 1-gallon jugs of drinking water.
That's 24 GALLONS of water. So, I looked in his carriage, then back at him, then back at the carriage again. And, while I was standing there, contemplating the fact that people by gallons of water by the dozen, I felt a small portion of my evil brain spontaneously combust. In what world, in what plane of existence, would a 5 INCH SNOWFALL constitute the necessity of 24 gallons of water? Why, in the name of all that is sweet and good in Odin's Beard, would you feel the need to stock up on water during a snowfall that wouldn't even cover my cock? How do you drive to Wal-Mart during the beginning of a snowstorm, pass by the beverage aisle, glance over at the Wal-Mart-brand gallon jugs of water and think "Fuck! There's snow everywhere and it might last until...well..until later tomorrow! I don't know if I can survive until then, I'd better stock up on WATER!!"
It boggles the mind how people who live in Connecticut, who have lived in Connecticut for most of thier lives, can consistently freak the fuck out over a little fucking SNOW every fucking year.
Oh, and learn how to drive, fuckwads. Don't blast down a residential road at 40 mph and be surprised when you spin out into someone's mailbox. And the parking lights are for PARKING, headlights are for DRIVING.
God, I hate people.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
Deflecting Bullets With the Power Of His Rockin'
In honor of it being the day before St. Patrick's Day, I'm getting drunk.
While watching The Incredibles.
At 9:30 AM.
I rule at life.
EDIT: I just finished a 6-pack in about an hour. Does that mean I have a drinking problem?
EDIT2: HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY EVE!!!! W00T!!!
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In honor of it being the day before St. Patrick's Day, I'm getting drunk.
While watching The Incredibles.
At 9:30 AM.
I rule at life.
EDIT: I just finished a 6-pack in about an hour. Does that mean I have a drinking problem?
EDIT2: HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY EVE!!!! W00T!!!
Monday, March 14, 2005
Next Road Trip Destination...
...Madera, California.
Never heard of it? Neither have I.
But they have THIS:
And that should be all you need to know to realize why there must be a road trip to Madera, CA.
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...Madera, California.
Never heard of it? Neither have I.
But they have THIS:
And that should be all you need to know to realize why there must be a road trip to Madera, CA.
Something To Get Pissed About Again
Initially found at, of all places, imdb.com:
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Initially found at, of all places, imdb.com:
Bush TV
At least 20 federal agencies have produced and distributed hundreds of promotional news clips during the past four years, many of which have aired on the news programs of local TV stations with no disclosure of the government's role in their production, the New York Times disclosed Sunday. They include a State Department-produced clip filmed in Kansas City purportedly showing reaction of Iraqi-Americans to the fall of Baghdad, with one man appearing on camera saying, "Thank you, Bush. Thank you, U.S.A." Another report showed a public relations worker for the Transportation Security Administration appearing on camera as a "reporter" describing the administration's launch of a security program as "one of the most remarkable campaigns in aviation history." The "reporter," the newspaper revealed, also "used a false name." Although recent articles have suggested that a handful of columnists and commentators had been paid by the Bush administration to air positive reports about its programs and policies, the Times said, "the administration's efforts to generate positive news coverage have been considerably more pervasive than previously known." The article also accused television stations of "widespread complicity or negligence" and violating ethics standards by airing the clips without attribution.
Saturday, March 12, 2005
2005: A Year to Rival 1996 in terms of music production?
Seriously, looking at some of the bands releasing new albums this year, 2005 has the potential to be one of the best years for music in the past decade. Take a look at some of these gems coming out:
Daft Punk - Human After All: March 15
Apocalyptica - Reflections: March 22
Strapping Young Lad - Alien: March 22
Queens of the Stone Age - Lullabies to Paralyze: March 22
Beck - Guero: March 29
Garbage - Bleed Like Me: April 12
Mudvayne - Lost And Found: April 12
The Flaming Lips - Latenight Tales: April 19
Ben Folds - Songs For Silverman: April 26
eels - Blinking Lights & Other Revelations: April 26
Bruce Springsteen - Devils and Dust: April 26
Weezer - Make Believe: May (day TBA)
Mike Doughty - Haughty Melodic: May 3
Nine Inch Nails - With Teeth: May 3
They Might Be Giants - Users Guide To They Might Be Giants: May 3
Team Sleep - Team Sleep: May 10
Lucinda Williams - Live at the Fillmore: May 10
System Of A Down - Mesmerize: May 17
Audioslave: May 17
Gorillaz - Demon Days: May 24
Life Of Agony - Broken Valley: May 31
Dream Theater - Octavarium: June 7
Coldplay - X&Y: June 7
Bob Mould - Body of Song: July 26
Dandy Warhols - Odditorium or Warlords of Mars: Late Summer/Early Fall (date TBA)
Shonen Knife - Genki Shock: Fall Release (date TBA)
System Of a Down - Hypnotize: Late Fall (date TBA)
The White Stripes: (date TBA)
AFI: (date TBA)
Guns N' Roses - Chinese Democracy: Never, so stop waiting for it.
Combined with the already available releases from The Mars Volta, ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead, Judas Priest and Bright Eyes, 2005 is looking like it's gonna be the hardest-rockin' year in a looooong time.
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Seriously, looking at some of the bands releasing new albums this year, 2005 has the potential to be one of the best years for music in the past decade. Take a look at some of these gems coming out:
Daft Punk - Human After All: March 15
Apocalyptica - Reflections: March 22
Strapping Young Lad - Alien: March 22
Queens of the Stone Age - Lullabies to Paralyze: March 22
Beck - Guero: March 29
Garbage - Bleed Like Me: April 12
Mudvayne - Lost And Found: April 12
The Flaming Lips - Latenight Tales: April 19
Ben Folds - Songs For Silverman: April 26
eels - Blinking Lights & Other Revelations: April 26
Bruce Springsteen - Devils and Dust: April 26
Weezer - Make Believe: May (day TBA)
Mike Doughty - Haughty Melodic: May 3
Nine Inch Nails - With Teeth: May 3
They Might Be Giants - Users Guide To They Might Be Giants: May 3
Team Sleep - Team Sleep: May 10
Lucinda Williams - Live at the Fillmore: May 10
System Of A Down - Mesmerize: May 17
Audioslave: May 17
Gorillaz - Demon Days: May 24
Life Of Agony - Broken Valley: May 31
Dream Theater - Octavarium: June 7
Coldplay - X&Y: June 7
Bob Mould - Body of Song: July 26
Dandy Warhols - Odditorium or Warlords of Mars: Late Summer/Early Fall (date TBA)
Shonen Knife - Genki Shock: Fall Release (date TBA)
System Of a Down - Hypnotize: Late Fall (date TBA)
The White Stripes: (date TBA)
AFI: (date TBA)
Guns N' Roses - Chinese Democracy: Never, so stop waiting for it.
Combined with the already available releases from The Mars Volta, ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead, Judas Priest and Bright Eyes, 2005 is looking like it's gonna be the hardest-rockin' year in a looooong time.
"Are You Threatening Me, Master Jedi?"
If you haven't seen it yet, you NEED to find* what will surely be the coolest 2 and a half minutes of your entire fucking life. The movie trailer so awesome, it required its own teaser:
STAR WARS EPISODE III: REVENGE OF THE SITH
Yoda vs. Palpatine! Samuel L. motherfucking Jackson! A planet of fire! Starship battles! The emergence of the Empir!. Wookies! Natalie Portman looking hot! Anakin vs. Obi-Wan! Blue hand-lightning! Darth fucking Vader!
The whole fucking thing.
And it's all a mere 68 days away. May 19th can't possibly get here soon enough.
* of course, downloading and watching this video file is unethical and extremely illegal and shouldn't be done. It was merely a...rhetorical suggestion. Yes...rhetorical...let's go with that.
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If you haven't seen it yet, you NEED to find* what will surely be the coolest 2 and a half minutes of your entire fucking life. The movie trailer so awesome, it required its own teaser:
STAR WARS EPISODE III: REVENGE OF THE SITH
Yoda vs. Palpatine! Samuel L. motherfucking Jackson! A planet of fire! Starship battles! The emergence of the Empir!. Wookies! Natalie Portman looking hot! Anakin vs. Obi-Wan! Blue hand-lightning! Darth fucking Vader!
The whole fucking thing.
And it's all a mere 68 days away. May 19th can't possibly get here soon enough.
* of course, downloading and watching this video file is unethical and extremely illegal and shouldn't be done. It was merely a...rhetorical suggestion. Yes...rhetorical...let's go with that.
Sunday, March 06, 2005
Do What Now?
Some disturbingly freak-tacular news from the fine folks at Ain't-It-Cool-News:
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Some disturbingly freak-tacular news from the fine folks at Ain't-It-Cool-News:
I do not know if this merits a blip on your radar or not but we attended the MTR's event for Adult Swim last night. Seth Green talked about some upcoming Family Guy episodes (one with Drew Barrymore as his teacher who tries to hire Chris to kill her husband) ... but we also learned some Aqua Teen Hunger Force news.
They have completed a movie and it is unknown at this time if it will go straight to DVD or if there is enough interest for a theatrical release. This news comes straight from the horse's mouth of Matthew Maiellaro (writer/co-creator/co-producer of ATHF) and verified by Dave Willis (writer/co-creator/co-producer of ATHF).
Struggling to Fit In
So, just like all the cool kids, I'm gonna be posting the first ten mp3s from the randomized playlist of every single music file on my computer:
1. Ministry - World (5:13)
2. Fountains of Wayne - Supercollider (5:05)
3. At The Drive-In - At The Drive-In - in - relationship of command - arcarsenal (2:55)
4. Wilco - Wilco - Being There - Disc Two - Sunken Treasure (6:51)
5. flogging molly - cruel mistress (2:57)
6. Gorillaz - Gorillaz - Gorillaz - Re-Hash (3:38)
7. Apex Theory - Mucus Shifters.mp3
8. joss stone-some kind of wonderful .mp3
9. Notorious B.I.G. - unbelieveable.mp3
10. Machine Head - Hellalive - I'm Your God Now.mp3
And, what the holy hell, here's the next ten, since I'm bored as shit:
11. faith no more (live) - lisbon, portugal - april 7, 1998 (last show) - 15 - epic.mp3
12. smashing pumpkins - we only come out at night.mp3
13. Hole - Violet.mp3
14. Randy Savage - Speaking From The Heart.mp3
15. Incubus - The Warmth.mp3
16. Hank Williams Sr. - Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain.mp3
17. Sepultura - Breed Apart.mp3
18. The Distillers - sing sing death house - I Understand.mp3
19. green day-wake me up when september ends.mp3
20. Children Of Bodom - Black Widow.mp3
Hey, maybe this time, Blogger won't devour my post with much gnashing of teeth and crunching of bones!
That would be lovely.
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So, just like all the cool kids, I'm gonna be posting the first ten mp3s from the randomized playlist of every single music file on my computer:
1. Ministry - World (5:13)
2. Fountains of Wayne - Supercollider (5:05)
3. At The Drive-In - At The Drive-In - in - relationship of command - arcarsenal (2:55)
4. Wilco - Wilco - Being There - Disc Two - Sunken Treasure (6:51)
5. flogging molly - cruel mistress (2:57)
6. Gorillaz - Gorillaz - Gorillaz - Re-Hash (3:38)
7. Apex Theory - Mucus Shifters.mp3
8. joss stone-some kind of wonderful .mp3
9. Notorious B.I.G. - unbelieveable.mp3
10. Machine Head - Hellalive - I'm Your God Now.mp3
And, what the holy hell, here's the next ten, since I'm bored as shit:
11. faith no more (live) - lisbon, portugal - april 7, 1998 (last show) - 15 - epic.mp3
12. smashing pumpkins - we only come out at night.mp3
13. Hole - Violet.mp3
14. Randy Savage - Speaking From The Heart.mp3
15. Incubus - The Warmth.mp3
16. Hank Williams Sr. - Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain.mp3
17. Sepultura - Breed Apart.mp3
18. The Distillers - sing sing death house - I Understand.mp3
19. green day-wake me up when september ends.mp3
20. Children Of Bodom - Black Widow.mp3
Hey, maybe this time, Blogger won't devour my post with much gnashing of teeth and crunching of bones!
That would be lovely.
