Monday, January 31, 2005
This just in: High School students are completely retarded.
"The liberty of the press is indeed essential to the nature of a free state: but this consists in laying no previous restraints upon publications, and not in freedom from censure for criminal matter when published. Every freeman has an undoubted right to lay what sentiments he pleases before the public: to forbid this, is to destroy freedom of the press: but if he publishes what is improper, mischievous or illegal, he must take the consequences of his own temerity."
- Sir William Blackstone, Commentaries, 1765
"If all mankind minus one were of one opinion, and only one person were of the contrary opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person, than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind."
- John Stuart Mill, On Liberty, 1947
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.
Learn it. Live it. Love it.
Saturday, January 29, 2005
Many cool things coming out in the first half of 2005. This Tuesday comes Brak Show Volume 1 and Sealab 2021 Volume 2. But, looking those up on Amazon, I came across something that made me very excited:
Oh yes.
April 12, 2005.
A whopping TWENTY-FOUR episodes. And less expensive than the usual Adult Swim DVDs. Now, let's be honest, SGC2C Vol. 1 was kinda boring. They were just starting out, and had problems getting really good, interesting guests. Vol. 2, you could see they were getting into the swing of things and that the show was improving. But 1997, that's when Space Ghost started hitting it's stride.
Also coming out on April 12:
Sweet on all different types of levels.
2005 is gonna rock.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
So, last night at work was horrible. It was easily the busiest night we've had since the holiday season (and at FedEx, that's no easy task). SO, what do you do after a shitty, shitty night of carrying boxes?
You get drunk.
At 9 A.M.
I am my own hero.
And, for the record, Chimaira's "Power Trip" has never sounded so awesome.
And, unlike OFB, I can still type good while wasted. Suck on it.
Monday, January 24, 2005
Alrighty, I just watched the trailer for the Fantastic Four movie, and I have a couple of gripes, as most of the movie nerd community does:
1. Isn't The Thing supposed to be, I dunno, about as big as The Hulk, not just with the build of an average sized bodybuilder? I mean, Arnold Schwarzenegger is bigger than The Thing is in this movie. And, along those same lines...
2. The Commish?? as Ben fucking Grimm? WHAT THE FUCK?
3. Speaking of casting woes, why Jessica Alba? As hot as she is, she just looks wrong and uncomfortable in the Invisible Woman suit.
4. The whole thing looks like they used less special effects than Spiderman and chintzed out on making it the best movie they could. I mean, when you have FOUR freaking superheroes, all of which require a ton of special effects to adequately pull off, you expect it to be pulled off as well as, if not BETTER than, a movie with ONE superhero in it.
5. Listen, I'm not against giving huge franchise movies to improbable directors. Spiderman went to the guy who did Evil fucking Dead. Lord of the Rings was directed by Peter Jackson, a man who only made disturbing, overly-gory Michael J. Fox movies; and now they've given him KING FUCKING KONG. BUT, when deciding which director to give a long-awaited and ferociously fan-based-oriented movie like Fantastic Four to, I can think of a bunch of people I would rather have at the helm than the director of such cinematic classics as Barbershop and Taxi.
6. Despite all this bullshit, I will most likely go see the fucking movie anyways.
And as always, Penny-Arcade has all the answers.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Vanity Fair's Judy Bacharach totally rips apart this Fox News anchor who, when faced with a message contrary to Fox News' pre-approved programming, goes into complete shutdown mode. View it while you can.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Thus begins the new song "Cigaro" by System of a Down. Download it here. How can you go wrong with an opening line like that anyways, honestly?
Someone on Blabbermouth.net described it much better than I could:
"That sounded like the soundtrack to Disney's "Aladdin" on angel dust...LOTS of angel dust."
See? Now you're too intrigued NOT to download it.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Describe yourself using one band and song titles from that band | |
| Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band: | Faith No More |
| Are you male or female: | Introduce Yourself/Just A Man |
| Describe yourself: | Ugly In The Morning |
| How do some people feel about you: | Helpless/The Real Thing |
| How do you feel about yourself: | Falling To Pieces |
| Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend: | She Loves Me Not/Everything's Ruined |
| Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend: | A Small Victory/Why Do You Bother |
| Describe where you want to be: | Naked In Front Of The Computer |
| Describe what you want to be: | King For A Day |
| Describe how you live: | Caffeine/The Gentle Art Of Making Enemies |
| Describe how you love: | Be Aggressive/Collision |
| Share a few words of wisdom | Surprise! You're Dead! |
Sunday, January 09, 2005
|Monday, January 03, 2005
Top 20(+2) albums of 2004
Taken as a whole, 2004 was, compared to other, shittier years, an amazing year in music. In fact, it was the first time I had any considerable amount of trouble narrowing it down to 20(+2) albums. I feel bad for neglecting some awesome records off this years list, so first, I give to you 2004's Runners-Up:
All That Remains - This Darkened Heart
The Killers - Hot Fuss
Iced Earth - The Glorious Burden
Incubus - A Crow Left Of The Murder
Sonic Youth - Sonic Nurse
Read Yellow - Radios Burn Faster
Fiery Furnaces - Blueberry Boat
Sparta - Porcelain
Killswitch Engage - The End of Heartache
36 Crazyfists - A Snow-Capped Romance
N.E.R.D. - Fly Or Die
They Might Be Giants - The Spine
Cake - Pressure Chief
Fear Factory - Archetype
R.E.M. - Around the Sun
And now, the moment that only I have been waiting for all year: the comprehensive list of the 20(+2) Best Albums released between January 1, 2004 and December 28, 2004 (that I have listened to, anyways). Spanning from metal to indie to mainstream to hip-hop and everywhere in between, these albums have had a huge impact on music this year, and in all have been the pinnacle of celebration of all that is good in music today. These are all must-listens, and they're all incredible. So, without any further ado; I give to you the Top 20(+2) Albums of the Year Two-Thousand-and-Four.
+2: David Cross – It’s Not Funny
David Cross continues to impress the fuck out of me by bringing his stand up act to an almost Bill Hicks level of brilliance. Possibly the best social satirist in
+1: Patton Oswalt – Feelin’ Kinda Patton
I totally didn’t see this coming and, if he didn’t receive Bob & David’s recommendation, I probably would have never heard of him in the first place, since I do not watch the King of Queens. Thank God I picked this up, because Patton Oswalt has put out one of the most hilarious comedy albums I’ve ever heard. Like a strange crossbreed of David Cross and Dave Attell, Oswalt mixes disgusting and offensive first-hand accounts of absurdity and memories of 70’s pop culture with relevant political ranting and social satire to split your sides. Best comedy album of the year.
20: Interpol – Antics
Picking up the ball from where New Order dropped it a long while ago, Interpol put out a cheerfully depressing album full of synths, guitars, and cool pop hooks that just happen to also be highly listenable.
19: Head Automatica – Decadence
Glassjaw singer Daryl Palumbo decided that his emocore band didn’t sound enough like Squeeze, so he got together with Dan the Automator to put out a disco-punk-pop record. No really, that’s exactly what happened, and the result is a fun, catchy record that you can either dance to or kill yourself to. Of course, perhaps I’m biased because I rock out to Glassjaw in my spare time, but this is still an awesome record.
18: Machine Head – Through The Ashes of Empires
Machine Head finally motherfucking returns with what I consider to be the best album of their careers. After an intensely disappointing studio album and a horribly-titled live album, Machine Head picked themselves up off the ground and put out an album full of loud, hard songs that finally show the world what we’ve all known they are capable of. Hail!
17: Oh No – The Disrupt
The brother of studio madman MF Doom got a little help from his brother and released the second best underground hip hop record of the year. Much more linear and down-to-earth than Doom, Oh No mixes new and different instrumentation (including music pulled directly from a couple NES games) with an interesting flow and strange lyrics and blows almost everyone else out of the water. This is the shit that SHOULD be played on the Hot whatever stations.
16: Crisis – Like Sheep Led To Slaughter
Hands down, the best death metal album I’ve ever listened to, and that includes Nile’s “In Their Darkened Shrines”. This chick-fronted band kicks six hundred and sixty-six different types of ass and blows everyone else out of the water.
15: Beastie Boys – To The 5 Boroughs
It took fucking long enough. The band that everyone figured either disappeared off the face of the earth or just gave up released their first album in 6 years and, thankfully, didn’t phone any of it in. Going back in time, the Beasties used a lot of old-school-type beats, loops and rhyme styles to put out an audio love letter to Brooklyn, to New York City, and to America. They, surprisingly, are still laying down mad beats at 80% accuracy. I believe that still qualifies as ill, at least from a technical standpoint.
14: The Rasmus – Dead Letters
A Finnish band puts out the album that The Cure should have this year. Dead Letters is full of nicely produced alternative rock with synthesizers piled high and lots of dark (but not forcibly so) lyrics. Not as metal as HIM, but The Rasmus rock out more.
13: Flogging Molly – Within a Mile From Home
This band never ceases to make my Irish heart smile. A crazy Celtic drunken rampage put to rock music. Every single track sounds like it could be a traditional Irish folk song. Flawless, rockin’ and, most of all, good music (and you can dance to it, too!).
12: Loretta Lynn – Van Lear Rose
Jack White helps to resurrect Loretta Lynn’s career, and it is fantastic. This is what country music should sound like: heartbreaking and rowdy. Even at 70 years old, Lynn’s voice is perfectly emotive.
11: Probot – Probot
Dave Grohl’s love letter to all that is metal is absolutely brilliant. Making 11 different metal riffs and giving them out to all of his favorite metal singers from the 80’s sounds like a cut-and-paste, phone-it-in-type recipe for disaster, but it couldn’t have come out more perfectly. The songs featuring King Diamond, Eric Wagner and Tom G. Warrior are particularly awesome.
10: Wilco – A Ghost Is Born
Jeff Tweedy kicks the drugs and goes absolutely batshit insane. Even more of a departure than Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, A Ghost Is Born is pure experimental wonder. Songs exceeding 7 minutes (including one song with 12 minutes of repetitive droning), songs celebrating unknown artists and lots of photos of eggs. Bizarre, fascinating and listenable. An egg-cellent all-around record. (I know, I'm ashamed of myself too.)
09: Fantomas – Delerium Cordia
Doctors’ mutterings. Patient’s screams. Heartbeats. Soaring melodies. Crazed ear-splitting dissonance. One track, 78 minutes long. This is the soundtrack to a surgery gone wrong. Mike Patton is a mad genius. One of the few real pieces of contemporary auditory art available to the masses. Not for the squeamish. Or the completely sane, for that matter.
08: Blood Brothers – Crimes
The Blood Brothers do it once again! With slightly slicker production and yet still sounding more schizophrenic, Crimes is a testament to musical insanity. Bizarre lyrics, crazed punk guitars and great noise all coming together.
07: Madvillain – Madvillainy
The delightfully mad MF Doom teamed up with superstar indie-rap producer Madlib and produced the second greatest rap album of the year. Creating beats out of accordions, old jazz records and strings, Madlib invents the perfect backgrounds for Doom’s meandering, brilliant lyrical spirals. Containing pure rap talent with almost no choruses anywhere, this is one of my favorite rap albums of all time, and one of the most brilliant recordings of the year.
06: Modest Mouse – Good News For People Who Like Bad News
The band that could never, ever go mainstream went completely mainstream and shocked everyone by releasing one of the best rock records of the past several years. Sounding very much like the more experimental side of the White Stripes combined with just a little Pink Floyd, they put out a weird and most consistently rockin' record. A very strange vocal delivery combined with avant-garde instrumentation and catchy choruses makes for one great rock record. Plus, it gives you a sense of hope that anyone, even you could be a rock singer. There aren’t enough good things to say.
05: Jimmy Eat World – Futures
Who the hell saw this coming? On their first album in 3 years, Jimmy Eat World perfects the power pop aspect of their form of emo/rock and puts out an album on the level of Clarity, their most ambitious record ever, and proves what we all knew: when they aren’t overplayed to a slow radio death, Jimmy Eat World is one hell of a good band. Overall, a fine surprise, and a shockingly good record.
04: Mastodon – Leviathan
The best metal album of the year, and one of the best metal albums I have ever heard. The best, most bone-crushing riffs I have ever heard placed in an album themed around the novel Moby Dick; this album is almost frighteningly good. It also happens to have the most beautiful cover art I’ve ever seen. From the devastating Blood and Thunder to the mind-blowing Iron Tusk to the grand epic Hearts Alive, this is everything a metal record should be.
03: Kanye West – College Dropout
An independent hip hop record on the most mainstream hip hop label in the world, with a bunch of mainstream hip hop friends helping out; this may be the most amazingly catchy album of the year, and definitely one of the best hip hop albums I’ve heard. The religious (and yet non-preachy) Jesus Walks, the emotional All Falls Down, the ingenious Through the Wire, it’s all madly intelligent, all wildly creative and all fantastic. An example of perfect production, and an all-around classic.
02: Franz Ferdinand – Franz Ferdinand
The catchiest damn thing I’ve heard in years! Synthesizers, guitars, bad-ass hooks and incredible melodies, it’s one of the most perfect rock records made in this century. This gaggle of British pretty-boys make some wonderful sounds together; it’s actually surprising that they’ve only had one hit in
01: Green Day – American Idiot
Flawless. Perfect. A classic, to be held in as high esteem as The Who’s “Tommy” and Pink Floyd’s “The Wall”, and I am in no way exaggerating. A concept record about the ennui, depression and pressures of living in a red-state America; it is both poignant and great music. Fantastic storytelling, extremely experimental for a Top 40 band, the entire project was something totally unexpected, yet totally perfect. The prototypical snotty teen punk band grew up, matured, and blew every other album out of the water. From the straight-ahead Ramones-style punk of She’s a Rebel to the typical Green Day style of I Don’t Care to the old school rock n roll of Rock and Roll Girlfriend to the soul-crushingly sad Wake Me Up When September Ends, this is, without any semblance of doubt, the best album of the year, and a must listen for anyone who has ever listened to rock music.
